So, only six more days until I check in as a “client” at Shades of Hope. I started off kinda nervous… now I’m just excited! The whole thing reminds me of summer camp. Actually, SOH even looks like summer camp! Ohhhhhhh, I can’t help but grin 🙂 You see, I absolutely adored camp when I was kid. Now, don’t confuse “camp” with “camping”… there’s a difference. There’s a difference. I’m not a big fan of camping, I’ll go, but I’m not a big fan… especially now that I’m sober. I just hate sleeping in a tent or outside on the ground. I HATE IT! I think its because of camping in the Boy Scouts, for some reason they never let us bring a change of clothes. We stayed in the same uniform for like three days, slept outside and only ate Cup O Noodle! By only, I mean ONLY.. Breakfast, lunch and dinner. It was soooo gross. I can say, unequivocally, that I detested all six years of Boy Scouts.
Now, camp is where it was going on! Starting in the 5th grade, I began going to camp every Spring break and Summer. It was almost always church related and always a blast! I’ve been to camps in New Mexico, Oklahoma, Florida, Colorado, Texas… all across the United States! Some of my best childhood memories take place on a charter bus… driving for hours and hours, doped up on sugar water, laughing until I cried and drifting off to sleep while listening to New Order on my Diskman 🙂 I almost want to say that “going to” camp was the best part… almost. Okay, that’s enough, I may start a happy cry at my desk at work… I’m not in the mood for that right now.
Moving on! The Week Long or Six Day… I’m attending. I hear its going to be intense. So, I’ve been preparing! For the past eight days I have been absinate from white flour, most sugars (not counting fruit), potatoes, most fats and all fast foods. I won’t even order a salad from a fast food joint. Listen… I’m not going to risk standing in line, staring at a trough of french fries. No, Sir! This week I will begin to wing myself off of cigarettes and caffeine. Help me Jesus. This morning I have not smoked and I have only had one “small” cup of coffee. So far so good… every three minutes I have to pray to God that he relieves me from this obsession. Hour by hour, minute by minute if I have to. Why not wait until I check in?? I don’t want to spend the first several days there acting like a total beotch. This really is for the safety of others. Plus, I don’t want to have headaches there and not be able to take anything for it. Word on the street is you don’t get nutin for the pain. NUTIN’!
I’ll keep you guys posted! I’ll be keeping a video journal of the whole experience that I’ll share online.. so keep checking back! If you have any words of encouragement I’d love to hear from ya! firstname.lastname@example.org
My name is Brock Cravy and I’m addicted to me.